When we lead with story, everything gets better. Stories make us real, relatable, and riveting. I spend an entire day with corporate teams exploring this idea and helping them put it into practice so leaders can create higher-functioning teams.
Here, I want to share one tiny sliver of that idea.
What does it mean to be riveting? It’s not just about being compelling and engrossing. It’s about capturing your audience’s attention, and the benefits are so great I sometimes get called out for being idealistic (as evidence of my idealism, please reference the first statement in this note). When you’ve captivated an audience, they listen, understand, and get on board with your idea. This is the power of storytelling in leadership.
For some, being riveting comes naturally. For others, we must invest time and energy and consider what it means and how to do it.
I’ve identified three guiding principles that create riveting leaders:
- Truth – By being true to who you are instead of who you should be, you stand out instead of blending in.
- Positivity – Have a growth/opportunity mindset.
- Purpose – Articulate a vision connected to purpose.
But there’s something else. There is an element to storytelling that gets left out of the storytelling conversation, and I blame this omission on the very word itself: “Storytelling.”
At its core, being riveting requires us to be outwardly focused. It’s about being curious about those you want to reach. What’s on their mind? What questions do they hold about your message? What do they value? This curiosity is the key to relevant storytelling.
In other words, we listen before we even start telling a story. Of course, you wouldn’t approach someone in real life and launch into a story without context or introductions. That would qualify you as tone-deaf rather than riveting. Over the Fourth of July holiday, a small group gathered around a fire late into the night as the sun barely sank below the mountain ridge close to midnight. I noticed two types of conversationalists – those who listen and jump in immediately with ideas and solutions or their own story and those who sit in curiosity and ask the teller deeper questions.
“To be good at questioning, we have to stop doing and stop knowing in order to stay asking.” – Warren Berger, A More Beautiful Question
What would it be like if you resisted the urge to tell and instead asked?
Now, that would be riveting.
So, here’s a challenge for you. Try it in your next social setting and see what happens. You might then bring it into your work life next. Swap a story for a question. See how it transforms your communication and leadership skills.
What I’ve been listening to and reading:
- Currently reading:
- Sun House by David James Duncan. I feel liberated, having allowed myself to pick fiction back up. I can’t believe I put this restriction in place, thinking I needed to learn and improve through non-fiction. Back to Sun House. I read Brothers K and The River Why decades ago; his storytelling is rich and beautiful. I’m excited to dive into this TOME and see and drink in the way he weaves these stories together. So far, and I’m only 25 percent in, there are four characters, each with their own story, each seemingly unrelated. I can’t wait to see how they come together.
- Recently finished: The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid. Consumed in a single long weekend. Great summer read. If you haven’t read her Daisy Jones and the Six, you just got a two-fer.
- Listened to:
- Richard Schwartz on The Time Ferris Show, episode #492. I’m learning about Internal Family Systems (IFS) and how we have a whole family of characters as part of ourselves. Our internal stories change when we get to know these different parts of ourselves.
- That Was Us: This is for you if you watched and loved This is Us. Episode 2 features an interview with creator Dan Fogelman, and we learn all about how he created the stories of the Pearsons and what went into them. LOVE.
Take care out there.
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SOME WAYS I MAY BE ABLE TO HELP YOU AND YOUR TEAM:
LEAD YOUR WAY: This mentoring/coaching program is designed to help you step into your leadership and show up as your best self so you can communicate to connect and amplify your impact.
COMMUNICATE TO CONNECT: In my storytelling workshops, I teach leaders of all capabilities how to engage authentically with their teams, community, and stakeholders to create meaningful connections that build trust, increase team engagement and lead to better fundraising and revenue generation.
Did you have something else in mind? Let’s talk and see how I might be able to help. Contact me and we’ll schedule a chat.
Stay in touch.
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